the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
