yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
