im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
