Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
