I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
