Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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