he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
