Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
