Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
