And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
