Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
