He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
