ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Randomize
