3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
If I die, sorry about rent.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
