Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
