i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
