So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
