It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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