For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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