Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize