speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
