"it" just moved
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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