it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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