I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I understand Curling. That high.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
