Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
