i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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