no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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