he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
