I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
