I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Blood and glitter go together right?
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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