I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
