Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
