ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
the night ended with taco bell and tears
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
