big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
