My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
