no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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