Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Randomize