hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
