Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
