This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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