What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
