let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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