Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
