i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
