When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
