Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
