We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
