Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
