Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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