Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
