i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
